Three postmen chatting on Palatine Road

Prefer to stay in?

Yes, why not.

Other people can go out in the rain.

It's their job after all.

In fact, why leave the house at all.

We will call and collect

that crap that you bought

but now want to return.

Like magic we will just absorb the extra load

and whistle cheerfully

as we come down the path

(not forgetting to close the garden gate).

And if the service begins to slide

through the sheer exhaustion

of the workforce

it's ok

you can come in 

and accuse us of not working hard enough

and I will politely say

Yes, of course you can speak to a manager

and then you can tell her

how you saw

three postman chatting on Palatine Road,

which is just not good enough.